Thursday, July 30, 2009

Stealth Pooping

I'm about to get all shitty on your asses (so to speak)!!

I work in a 12 story building and my company has 2 floors. Bellsouth has a call center in the building and they take up about 4 floors. Whole Foods Corporate offices are on a couple and then there's a bunch of other smaller companies.

This subject is not discussed in polite/gentile company but who said I was polite?? Who said my friends at work were polite?? I'm thinking most of you aren't so polite!

Pooping at work. We all do it, we all hate doing it but sometimes you just cant wait to get home to drop the kids off at the pool. I think its more of a female issue as the guys at work tell us all the time they dont care. They just crap away. Farting while peeing at the urinal is all the rage apparently. ewww. So us girls discussed the fact that we go to someone elses floor to pooh. Its too easy to get busted in our own bathroom. Someone is sure to recognize your shoes/sandals. And that just causes awkward pauses the next time you speak.

The whole reason this shitty subject came about is last week I read a blog by the blogess. It was her question and answer blog. Anyway someone asked how to poop in public. It was pretty funny. But what made me fall out of my chair at work last friday is the following Memo we recieved from the building management. They KNOW!!

Crimson Services


To: All Tenants
From: Bunnie Willis, Senior Property Manager
Date: 07/24/09
Re: AtlanTech Tower – Restroom Usage

Again, we are reminding everyone that employees are to use the rest rooms on the floors where they work. We continue to have people going off their floors to use the restrooms on other floors, leaving them quite messy. We will report the offenders to their supervisors for follow-up.

If the restroom on your floor is being serviced, you may go down to use the restrooms on the first floor.

Please remind your employees of this building policy. We appreciate everyone’s cooperation.

OMG!! THEY'RE ON TO US AT WORK!!!!! THEY KNOW WE POOP ON OTHER FLOORS!!!! LMAO!!! This means war! Now we've taken it upon ourselves to stealth poop other floors. Its a mission now and we will win!!

Viva la Poop!!


Mrs. Bunker said...

ick. Now imagine working in a SMALL office with one crapper thats way too close to my desk.
We're done being polite about it. If I see the Man Of The Office headed back that way, taking his coat off, I usually send out an emergency evacuation notice (pun intended), he never sprays, and there is always noise involved.

I think you should defiantly be going to the whole foods floor to drop the kids off. Remind them what carnivore poopoo smells like. Sorry. your topic, after all.

fun evening with miss Gia?

peedee said...

HaHa!! Your right...I shall stealth the Whole Foods floor next! lmao!

And Gia's ship didnt get in till late last night so we did breakfast this morning. No alcohol involved unfortunately. She's a love and her daughter is very sweet too.

Yer next. Lemme know when you and the brood are down in Florida.

Capt. Schmoe said...

I think most guys avoid "public" cans to "drop a deuce", but they view the work restroom as a little more like a personal one. We will avoid a gas station, ball park etc. but work is work.

Besides, I am at work for a minimum of 24 hrs, that's a little long to wait.

Thanks for this crappy post!!

peedee said...

Hey Capt! Bein at the station and the corporate world are sooooo different. I didnt even have a problem at station. Hell thats your home for 24 hours.

...and my father is famous for finding McDonalds or BK's. Wierd I know but he says they are clean...he was a construction supervisor so I guess anything is better than a port-a-potty. (puke)

Draft Queen said...

We do this at my job too. Only I work in a biotech park with 5 bldgs- each with 3 floors. Sometimes we even go to another bldg entirely to poop.

So far, there have been no regulations as to which floor or bldg we do our business in.

peedee said...

Yeah, stealth poopin is still running rampant around here. Viva la poop!